More and more, over the last few months, tasks or projects that have been mine have been handed over to other people. The process has speeded up, and the last three weeks have been particularly full of those kinds of things, with the exception of a three day event relating to part of next years work.
However, by Monday all, bar one commitment, should be complete. Well, the accounts may be a little way into next week… I’m having trouble getting motivated to finish them! I need a proper deadline, I think, not just my mental one, which has failed miserably to keep me on task there.
A couple of the relinquishments I have minded more than others. There are relinquishments of routines and ways of being that have been part of my life for a long time now, and it’s not easy to turn away from that. Mostly, however, I have been more than thankful to stop.
Yet, alongside the relinquishing, there’s also been a re-claiming process going on. Somewhere, somehow, I’d vanished under many, many layers of professional persona, in too many different areas. Part of what’s been happening now is a steadfast refusal to be anything but fully myself from now on. It’s very confusing to those who haven’t known me long, and who have only seen me in one, maybe two contexts, but those who have known me longer, on the whole, are commenting that I seem much, much more content with myself, and happy in ways they’ve not seen for a long time.
I’m also reclaiming many personal responsibilities that I had not been responsible for a good number of years. That’s a wee bit scary, but good as well! It had annoyed me on so many levels, but I’d not been aware of it until I’d taken them back. So, tomorrow, it’s back to tackling various bits of officialdom!